Sunday, January 12, 2014

Johnny's Adventures In The Muscle World: Expect The Unexpected


For previous part click here.

The situation was not looking good for California Muscle and Johnny. They were now official fugitives and even had a hostage – the waitress Molly.

'What do we do now?!', asked Little J and looked at California Muscle's biceps hoping that the brain of his friend was at least as big as his arm flexors.

'We have no choice but to go and ask my dad for help. It couldn't get any worse', answered California Muscle.

The dad of California Muscles, CT Flat Brain, was a classic lunatic but a tough son of a bitch. He lived in a small apartment located in the ghetto of the town. Technically, he had enough money to live anywhere in the world be has was spending the majority of his income on steroids and growth hormone – he was an addict for over 30 years and believed that life was too short to be small. Once the two men arrived at the address Cali Muscle put Molly in the trunk. She was scared to death and had no idea where she was nor who were her kidnappers.

After a long stair climb California Muscle and Little J were now in front of CT Flat Brain's apartment.

'Knock, knock' {California Muscle}

'What's the password?', said CT Flat Brain while loading a shotgun.

The password was: 'I am a dumb motherfucker with no brain cells left.' but California Muscle was ashamed to tell it in front of Little J so he pushed him away and told him to wait at a distance.

'I am a dumb motherfucker with no brain cells left.', said California Muscle.

CT Flat Brain barely opened the door and observed both men from head to toe. He looked a lot like Charlie Sheen, only with muscle and no hair, so maybe he didn't look like him at all.

'What brings you here? You want to thank me for saving you once again?,' said CT Flat Brain after letting Little J and California Muscle enter his dungeon.

'We are fucked, Flat Brain! The police and Antonio Montana are looking for us. We need help!', said California Muscle.

'So, you came back to daddy, after all!', said CT Flat Brain and smiled. His teeth looked like total garbage.

'Yes, but don't flatter yourself.', replied California Muscle.
After Cali Muscle and Johnny explained in details what happened to them CT Flat Brain made a proposition:

'The way I see it, {laughs} the only way to get out of this situation is to cut a deal with the police and in return promise them to find strong evidence that Antonio Montana is the biggest supplier of illegal growth hormone and steroids in the country.', said CT Flat Brain while showing with his face expressions and intonation that he considered Little J and Cali mentally challenged individuals who probably believed bodybuilding supplements were useful.

Suddenly, out of the blue, the unexpected happen.

'Boom, bam, boom' was heard and the door of the apartment was opened. It was Molly. She was holding two guns. It turns out she was a bad girl after all and was hiding two lady guns in her high heel shoes the whole time. She was mad.

'Everybody on the floor and put your hands where I can see them.', screamed Molly.

Little J and California Muscle immediately dropped on the floor but CT Flat Brain was like:

'Give me a break, blondie! I am not scared of your water guns.'

Molly shot him in the foot and said: 'Obey, old fart!'. CT Flat Brain fell on the ground and said:

At least this time your brought a real girl home, Cali!”.

Molly made Johnny tie California Muscle and his dad to the radiator and then locked Little J in the guest room. All the money, credit cards and even steroids of the Three Musketeers were gone.

Click here for the next part.